An Important Announcement.

People, I understand that you hate me, but it's never been more important that you listen to me than it is now. Stay calm and prepare yourselves for what it is I have to say.

Ricky Gervais is a robot dog.

I'm not sure about the where or hows or whys yet. I'm not sure if this is localised or whether you should stay indoors. I'm not even sure whether this is a good thing or a bad thing. The only thing I know is that I must go forth and spread the word. I imagine this is what Moses must have felt.

Go home to your loved ones, look them in the eyes, and say 'I love you and Ricky Gervais is a robot dog' then embrace them. Today we are all but men in the eyes of God.